stresses

this week, i am deep in the search for a new job, gaining weight like gang busters, and completely unsure whether staying in this mfa program is the right thing for me, but i managed to complete a piece for workshop memoir, and with the help of my best friend, complete something that approximates an acceptable mid-term project. i love it, actually. i'm only saying "something that approximates" because, once again (in this program), it's not enough for us to simply do assignments and give them our best, we have to trot them out for show and tell and thereby create a decidedly evaluative context (beyond the intstructor's grading, which makes sense) around the work.

it's so obvious that some people know more about electronic publishing than others, have access to different (perhaps better) resources, and depending upon their work situation, more time. i really wish we could just turn these in and receive personal feedback on them, or have the option to share if we wished without it counting against us if we don't.

this feels like junior high school.